LiG

I've felt completely ungrounded lately.

I need to focus.

See what time off does to me?

Three guys asked me to give them a job today. An ex harvard football player turned real estate broker, an editor who has worked on some known movies and a cowboy. Maybe it's because they're not subtle about it but something about it really weirds me out. I don't like talking about my work with people. I suppose I worry that's all they'll find interesting about me.

I used bodywash from a hotel and now I smell like a boy. Ugh.

Starting tomorrow I am working for a ghost reality tv show at a prison. I promised myself after Six Flags I would never work with ghost hunters again. Ah well. Should be fun? Right?

I also got my script for a teen talent show I am stage managing at the Fox. The Fox is beautiful; it's the theater that I fell in love with and probably the reason I wanted to stage manage in the first place. So now I am stage managing for a friend of mine there. Of course the judges for the talent show are heads of every big arts organization in St. Louis...I never half ass anything when it comes to work apparently. I didn't know they would be big wigs, I thought I was just going to be working with a friend. Go big or go home. Never been head of wardrobe, might as well go on tour with 100+original broadway costumes...sure why not.

Sometimes I forget I like myself. When I was younger I was pretty good at writing though so re reading old journals has been a nice conversation I get to have with myself.

I like working in entertainment. There's so many songs on the radio or movies I run into that have my friends involved with them somehow. For me it's like the idea of a bird gathering twigs for a nest after it lands in its new destination. Home is where the bird builds it. Not where it is. Or something like that. So to me, home is the people I carry with me. More than the four walls, garage and a newly done yard or something like that. I am a very lucky person, but sometimes I get caught up. I am so grateful for everyone the chooses to keep me in their life even if I am not there at every moment.

The last day I went home before I left my mom hide 2 chocolate bars and an Eckhart Tolle book in my bag. I really do like the book. But it means more to me because it's the book I had when I missed my bus to Chicago to see Mraz and last minute decided I would fly there instead. Later on I would talk to Jason and he would see my book. He happened to be reading the same one. It made me feel resourceful. I am capable of taking care of myself. I pay for myself, my car, my student loans. I am a responsible adult. Or something like that. And that's kind of awesome. Not everyone is capable of taking care of themselves.

Luckily I have friends that help too. A big part of what I do only happens because people want me to work with them or let me crash on their couch. I realize the amount of roommates I have had in life so far probably surpasses the average American human being.

Life is good.